JohnSeilerBlogs.com

I’ve been brainstorming with my production team all day for more casting choices for my movie, “Bush and Busher.” Here’s what we’ve come up with. (Yesterday’s choices are here.)

The Bush daughters: Paris Hilton and Britney Spears.

Ariel Sharon: Don Rickles. During an impasse on negotiations over Israel and Palestine, Sharon/Rickles shouts at Bush, “Listen here, you hockey puck!”

Yasser Arafat: Ringo Starr.

Bill Clinton: John Goodman.

Hillary: Rosie O’Donnell.

“America” (in metaphorical scenes about our country): Julia Roberts.

I’m moving forward with my idea to make a comedy movie about Bush, “Bush and Busher.” I figure the budget to get my all-star cast will be $100 million. But it likely will gross $900 million at the box office — quite a windfall as the stock market crashes.

Anyone eager to invest $100 million to make $800 million in profits (before taxes), please let me know.

I’ll do the combined writing/directing/producing job for $50,000 and the rights to the action toys that will be included in McDonald’s “Happy Meals.” Hey, I’m used to working cheap; I wrote for the O.C. Register for 19 years.

Here’s my cast lineup so far:

Dubya Bush: Jim Carrey.

Big Daddy Bush (the first President Bush): Jerry Lewis. Can you imagine the scenes with Carrey and Jerry? People will be cracking up so long they’ll have to pause the movie. It’ll be “The Nutty Professor” meets “Dumb and Dumber.”

Laura Bush: Jane Curtain, the comic actress from “Saturday Night Live: The Original Series” (1975-1980).

Cheney: Jack Nicholson, who introduces himself as he enters a room, “Heeeeeeeeere’s Cheney!”

“Rummy” Rumsfeld: Dan Aykroyd, doing one of his classic techie-talk personalities. Imagine him talking Rummy’s blather: “There are known knowns. These are things we know that we know. There are known unknowns. That is to say, there are things that we know we don’t know. But there are also unknown unknowns. There are things we don’t know we don’t know.”

Condi Rice: Eddie Murphy.

Saddam Hussein: Cheech Marin.

Colin Powell: Cedric the Entertainer.

John Ashcroft: Steve Martin.

Alberto Gonzales: Edward James Olmos.

Paul Wolfowitz: Mike Myers. Although nothing could be more revoltingly funny than Wolfowitz himself licking his comb in “Fahrenheit 9/11.”

Alan Greenspan: Woody Allen. Line: “Eternal inflation is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.”

Scooter Libby: Tom Green.

Vladimir Putin: Yakov Smirnoff. Line: “What you call 100,000 unemployed KGB agents? New recruits for Bush Homeland Security Department!”

This is just a start. Let me know if you have any other ideas: john@johnseiler.com

Reports Variety,

Oliver Stone has set his sights on his next directing project, “Bush,” a film focusing on the life and presidency of George W. Bush, and attached Josh Brolin to play the title role.

Wrong, wrong, wrong Ollie.

Josh Brolin is a fine actor, as he showed in the Coen Brothers’ great “No Country for Old Men.’ But any movie about Bush should be a comedy. So it should star Jim Carrey, who looks like our ludicrous Comic-in-Chief.

Bush is a doofus and dingaling, a fool, and a patsy.

What else but a comedy to portray a “conservative” who vastly increased government’s expense and power, who promised a “humble” foreign policy but got us stuck in quagmires in Iraq and Afghanistan, who uses the Constitution for toilet paper?

The best contemporary actor for the role today obviously is Carrey, a crackup of the first order. He’s already played a role on Bush’s pre-presidential life, “Dumb and Dumber,” so he’s prepped for the role.

Imagine Carrey in the actual scene in May 2003 when Bush flew onto an aircraft carrier and declared “Mission Accomplished” — as the war in reality was just beginning. The Marx Brothers couldn’t have come up with such a laff riot.

Besides, after Bush torturing America and the world for seven years now, with another disastrous year to go, we need some comic relief.

If Stone won’t do it as a comedy, then somebody else should make another Bush movie, staring Carrey. Call it “Bush and Busher.”